Tag Archives: Writing

Top Ten Writing Mistakes Editors See Every Day


Since I am in the final editing stages of “Mark of Shamash” as well as “The Gathering: Bk 1 of The Remnant: A Dystopian Paranormal Story”, I thought this post rather apropos. Enjoy

Stephen Carver: Author, Editor, Teacher

Goya -The sleep of reason produces monsters (c1799) recut

In addition to writing and teaching, one of the things I do for a living is to evaluate manuscripts for their suitability for publication. I read fiction (and non-fiction) across several genres, and write comprehensive reports on the books. I try always to guide the author towards knocking his or her project into a shape that could be credibly presented to literary agents, publishers and general readers. You know how Newman and Mittelmark introduce How Not to Write a Novel by saying, ‘We are merely telling you the things that editors are too busy rejecting your novel to tell you themselves, pointing out the mistakes they recognize instantly because they see them again and again in novels they do not buy,’ well they’re right; I am one of those editors.

However good the idea behind a novel, when the author is still learning the craft of writing – like any…

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7 Reality Checks For Authors


7 Reality Checks For Authors

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March 10, 2014 · 12:55 pm

Reality Check For Authors #10: The Hardest Part of Writing – Is Writing.


“I do not over-intellectualize the production process. I try to keep it simple: Tell the damned story.”
—Tom Clancy, WD

There are a gazillion articles, post, blogs, buy-me-now advise and or tools for writing a novel, memoir or whatever. And some of them are worth the read (others, not so much). But what few if any of them seem to have the kahunas to say is . . . writing is hard. Damn hard. Sounds like a ‘duh-should-of-had-a-V8-comment’, but hey, it is true none the less. Getting that first draft down is no piece of cake – at least not a first draft that isn’t a 25K word count novella. (And I don’t care what NaNoWriMo says, 99.999% of writers don’t crank out 50K in 30 days.)

Reality Check For Authors is –  Just do it! Write it! Get the first draft down no matter if its good, bad or so horrible you wouldn’t trust your mother not to shred it. Why? Because believe it or not, getting that first draft finished will do two things. First, it’ll make you feel incredibly warm and fuzzy inside and second, you’ll have the  beginnings of a book (good, bad or mamma shredding horrible) that you can now actually begin crafting into something even your mamma will be proud of.

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Changing Landscapes: Transmedial Immersedition


Transmedial Immersedition:

3 of 3 Part Article

“There is an increasing amount of interest and attention around the idea of ‘transmedia storytelling’ these days because of our increased awareness of converging and permeable media technology boundaries, but humans have always been transmedia storytellers.” Dr. Pamela Rutledge, PhD, MBA 

According to writer>digital transmedia strategist Jenka Gurfinkel, our lives are actually a series of Transmedial Experiences, and Transmedial Storytelling is just one of the ways we partner with other to share in the ‘tellin’.

From scratching in the dirt with a stick to shielding our e-book screens against the distorting rays of an afternoon sun, humans have been searching for ways with which to record and share the thoughts, events and imaginations in their lives through a media that would draw the listener and reader into the experience with them.

In the beginning our media was limited to cave walls, large rocks and tree bark. But as the wheel of time rolled forward and our imaginations and experience’s changed, we found ourselves chiseling on stone, scribbling on papyrus and pressing ink soaked blocks of wood on to sheets of paper.  Often in an effort to engage as many of the five senses of the reader as possible, these recordings were augmented by beautifully etched pictures, pressed flowers and wax – sealed impressions.

Like oil and chalk, words were used to paint images, recall childhood memories or draw forth the secret longing within the reader’s heart to be that hero, slay that villain or save that damsel in distress.

Through the use of layered media, a reader was invited to go beyond the written word and join the author in a partnership of the mind and senses. For a moment following the last word spoken or the final page turned, the audience was able to feel as though the possibility of living another life was but a word or thought away. The power of storytelling (be it verbal or written) offered even the lowest peasant a chance to be someone other than who they were for however long they could hold onto the imagined experience.

Then suddenly mankind is thrust into the twentieth century where we find ourselves viewing yet another tale or event from a variety of angles, textures and stimuli. What began on the pages of a book moved to the fabric of a theater screen, and from there we were handed tools which allowed us to delve even deeper into the characters we’d just watched through ARG’s like Warcraft,  RPG’s  such as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and in some cases,  like Neal Stephenson’s multimedia metaver  novel  “The Mongoliad”,  made a partner  in creating alternate story>plot line and endings.

Now instead of voyeuristically imagining ourselves as part of the story from a flat, one dimensional plane of readership, we have been given the opportunity to become engaged in a partnership whereby the tellin’ is a collaboration of transmedial immersion which will bring you and I into a 360˚ storytelling experience.  An alternate reality where it is no long one person’s imagination controlling our own.

Even as recent as eight months ago,  these experiences were still ( in this literary purist’s mind,) gaudy attempts to try and get people like me to leave our celestial peaks of antiquity and come down amongst the rabble rousers of technology. And without an object shiny enough to rouse my curiosity, I remained immune to their best marketing persuasions.

That is until I came across an article in Wired.com about a young first time novelist named Amanda Havard and her visionary concept Immersedition.  The flight out of my mountainous domain was rather faster than I was prepared for and even now I am still applying dressing to my skinned ego and cold compresses to my bruised imagination.

Ms. Havard’s  bio reads like most YA author’s who have grown up living with one foot in flat land and the other in the multi dimensional world of their own imaginations. Writing and telling stories from the time she was a little girl growing up in Dallas Texas, Amanda, like so many who have gone before, followed the natural literary progression from budding elementary school author to Vanderbilt University,  where she received her MA in childhood education.

In an interview with Sally Schoss (freelance writer for  Nashville Arts Magazine), Ms. Havard said that it was while she was on her way to attend a wedding in Tupelo, Mississippi that the idea for her The Survivor’s (a first novel in a five part series) and its immersive transmedial storytelling potential was first conceived.

But in 2008, while pitching to agents  her vision of publishing The Survivor’s in a transmedial format that would retain all the appearance of a book, while still allowing Ms. Havard and other collaborator’s  to produce a story that would offer the reader an immersive 360˚ experience, she told  reporter Angela Watercut  that what those agents basically said was,  ‘That’s a really cool story you have here and it sounds like a really marketable product, if you could just stop talking about all that other stuff, let it go and realize that you’re not going to have that, sit down, shut up and listen to what they tell you, then you’re going to be fine.’

But according to Ana Maria Allessi, vice president and publisher of Harper Media, due to the speed at which Ebook technology is changing, what Amanda Havard encountered was not a surprise. “That kind of reluctance to adapt and adopt new ideas in e-books is unfortunate, but it’s somewhat understandable. Tablet devices evolve at the speed of light compared to the book industry, in which a single title can take well over a year to produce. Heretofore publishers have been dependent on device makers to support any new ideas they want to execute…. One of the biggest hurdles…is creating something that will work across all devices and platforms. Currently, each enhanced e-book her company wants to put out must be altered to adhere to the specs of the Kindle Fire, the Nook Tablet and the iPad. (Nearly all tablets, however, support the stripped-down “.epub” files used in basic e-books.)

Undaunted in her vision, Ms. Havard, along with her father L.C. Havard (a former executive in the health insurance industry) created Chafie Press, a publishing company whose mission is ‘to reinvent storytelling’ by bringing several collaborators under the same roof. By bringing together a full media studio, Chafie Press book publishing, FPR music recording label, Point of Origin Music Publishing as well as a score of other in house videographers and designers, she was able to bring her dream to fruition.

Add Demibooks (who designed the Immersedition app for iPad, iPhone application) and you now have a revolutionary concept for storytelling that combines an undesecrated screen with immerseive watermarks, that when touched,  take the reader to more than 300 pages of history, backstory, character profile as well as ‘written>produced for music>video, fashion, iGoogle maps  and interative real time Twitter and Facebook accounts.

In this transmedial evolving reader’s mind, Amanda Havard and Chafie Creative have given a whole new meaning  to what it is to ‘do the tellin’ and pass on to yet another generation the ability to give greater depth and dimension to the world around us, and the ones we’ve yet to encounter.

If by the simple touch of a finger, the flick of a wrist and the push of imagination we can now extend ourselves beyond the confines of our known world, how much longer will it be before movies like Total Recall, Twilight Zone, Star Trek and Star Wars have become our past and no longer our future?

From the laptop of an uncensored dreamer,

SSpjut

If you’re an emerging author, established one or just like to read interesting content, feel free to share your thoughts on what you think transmedial storytelling is and how you see it affecting you and the future of ‘Doin the Tellin’

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Changing Landscapes: A Multiverse of Transmedial Storytelling


 2 of 3 Part Article

In Transmedial Readership, (the first of a three-part series on Changing Landscapes in the world of publishing), I took a look at the evolutionary progress of the modern-day eBook from its 1940’s humble (HES) electronic beginnings as a means to record the work of Catholic philosopher>theologian Thomas Aquinas, to its use as a way of sharing large amounts of text within the educational community.

In wasn’t until the late 90’s, early 2000’s that we saw this PC monolith of data transfer evolving into an embryonic hand-held device which would eventually morph into a AI that responds to voice recognition and allows its user to down load @4GSpeeds books, magazines, games and movies, access the internet, read PDF files as well as import>export those last minute>out the door>I forgot to send the statistics the boss needed 30 seconds ago.

Then I took a look at the predictions of the early 2000’s in regards to the viability of these handheld book readers, and concluded that the greatest giants to be slain at this present time weren’t the consumers, but rather the twin peaks of Author and Publisher on the Mt. Olympus of Literature, where change for the sake of change doesn’t come easy. From there I concluded that with an ever-increasing readership demand for “newer>better>faster” ways in which to partner with the writer’s, producer’s and designer’s of today’s storytelling, there is now a natural impetus for author’s to relook at how they will develop story content, as well as explore what other forms of media are available in order to bring the purveyors of  sensory interaction into the best experience possible.

So What is Transmedia?  

In an interview with Neela Sakaria, SVP @Latitude magazine, transmedia creator Andrea Phillips said that a true transmedia project is one that involves audience participation, which in turn means they will have to seek out and find multiple layers or pieces of information in order to understand the entire story. 

The Producer’s Guild list its Credit Guidelines for  “transmedia” as a project which “…must consist of three or more narrative storylines existing within the same fictional universe on any given platform: film, television, short film, broadband, publishing, comics, animation, mobile, special venue, DVD>Blu-ray>CD-ROM, narrative commercial, marketing rollouts and other technologies”.

In other words, there has to be a collaborative effort of three or more forms of media being used to tell the same story within the same platform. An early example of this would be L. Frank Baum‘s 1900 novel,  The Wonderful Wizard of Oz and Mary Shelley’s 1818 classic Frankenstein,  both of which were presented to the public on multiple platforms or layers of media (book > play > movie).

So What is Storytelling? 

Wikipedia  tells us that storytelling is a means by which mankind has of conveying events through words, images and sounds, which in turn are a part of every cultures means of entertainment, education and cultural preservation, endued with the power to instill moral values.  In his interview with fastcocreat.com, Gottschall said that he believed that fiction was more effective at changing the way a person believes about something than any writing that was specifically designed for that purpose.

 WhenRobert Pratten of Transmedia Storytelling was asked why people tell stories he said, “We tell stories to entertain, to persuade and to explain. Our minds do not like random facts or objects….we naturally and often subconsciously connect the dots…in a… stimulating way we call stories. Great stories win hearts and minds.”

Jonathan Gottschall, author of “The Storytelling Animal” states, “….story is the most powerful means of communicating a message…..People are moved by emotion. And Peter Guber, Studio Chief at Columbia Pictures and author of Tell to Win, says, “The best way to emotionally connect other people to our agenda begins with “Once upon a time…”

So Why Use Transmedia in Storytelling?

In a gathering of creative individuals hosted by Electronic Arts in 2003, Henry Jenkins, a Provost Professor of  Communication, Journalism, and Cinematic Art at the   USC Annenberg School for Communication and the USC School of Cinematic Arts noted in an article he wrote for Technology Review ,  that transmedia>multi- platform or enhanced storytelling as they knew it,  was on the cusp of undergoing significant changes and that those changes would mean an entirely new way of ‘doin the tellin’.

Those present stated that they saw a future where the masses would no longer be satisfied being told stories on a one-dimensional plane such as watching a movie or reading a book, leaving the theater or turning the last page, and be satisfied that what they have just experienced was all there is and there is nothing more.

People today have evolved from hunter>gathers on open grass lands   to hunter>gather’s on the internet, and they take “great pleasure…uncovering character backgrounds… plot points…and… making connections between different texts…”  It’s no longer enough just to read or watch a story from a one-dimensional aspect. Audiences now want to have an opportunity to enter into the story and participate in both its development as well as being able to decide alternate endings.  It becomes a case of where the whole is now greater than the parts.

By combing multiple layers of media in the development and publication of EBooks, authors can now take a story which began as an arrow through time and folded it back upon itself in complex layers impregnated with texture, depth, emotion and visualization. No longer do our characters move from point A to point B solely dependent upon their creator’s narrative abilities as the primary means by which the reader enters into and experiences the story.  By apply multiple sensory applications the story now becomes a collaborative partnership between the author, the characters, the reader and everyone else who has contributed in creating an experience that moves everyone beyond the land of cardboard cutouts and into the realm of interactive>inter-dimensional> transmedial adventures.

In the third and final part of this three-part series I want to zoom in on what transmedia storytelling is doing for EBooks and how Amanda Havard, first time author of the Urban fiction “Survivors“ and entrepreneurial genius behind Chafie Creations and the development of Immersedition, is taking the world of literary experiencialism to a whole new level.

From the laptop of an uncensored dreamer

SSpjut

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Changing Landscapes: A Multiverse of Transmedial Storytelling


Changing Landscapes: A Multiverse of Transmedial Storytelling.

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Reality Check For Authors #5: No Writer Is An Island


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 No Writer Is An Island

“If you need something from somebody always give that person a way to hand it to you.” ― Sue Monk KiddThe Secret Life of Bees

Writing any kind of book, be it memoir, how-to, guess-what and or even fiction, is never really a solitary pursuit. Even if you’re a lone wolf and you haven’t seen the light of day since you began your project eighteen months ago, there will still come a point in the journey where,  in order for you to really hone that puppy to a razor sharp edge of perfection, you’ll have to come out of your cave and let others invest in the process.

Now I’m not talking about letting just any Tom, Mary-Jane or Suzie pick apart our work. Even seasoned authors don’t invite barbaric scavengers to participate in the birth and raising of their children (and lets be honest here, anything a writer pecks out on their cell phone, tablet, laptop or PC is, in its most basic form, the genesis of yet another potentially creative work). But unless we are willing to submit our current project to the scrutiny of a different set of lens other than ourselves, family and significant others, the best we can hope is a piece half done.

So the Realty Check for Authors today is, No Writer Is An Island. And it takes a village with a population of at least  three or four others to help bring your manuscript or screenplay as close to perfection as it can get and not be considered one of the seven wonders of the world (which if, that were any indication of the size royalty check you were to receive would not be a bad thing). So find yourself a critique group you can trust, then put on the big girl/boy panties and embrace the process of letting others help you become the author they always knew you could be.

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Wards of Faerie


Book 1 in “The Dark Legacy of Shannara”; Terry Brooks; Del Ray, New York, NY, 2012

Just the fact that Terry Brooks writes again is enough to send me to the nearest bookstore and spend the bucks.

I picked up my first Shannara book at the age of fifteen and have never looked back.  From the hollowed shelves of my library, every book Terry Brooks has ever written,  looks out on the vicissitudes of my life,  and offers distant lands and heroic individuals who inspire,  and like the scented waters of Calgon…take me away.

But not this time, and not that far.

Only twice (not counting his autobiographical, “Sometimes the Magic Works”)) have I seen Brooks deviate from the paths of Ohmsford, Elessedil or Paranor; “The Magic Kingdom”, and “The Void and the Word”. So I don’t know why, but I was hoping that this might be number three.

Don’t misunderstand; I love the sagas of Wishsongs, Elfstones and Druidic orders. But after more than forty years I was hoping that, “Wards of Faerie” might offer a significant enough departure from the land of Shannara (like he did with “The Void and the Word” and “Genesis of Shannara”) that I wouldn’t feel like I was stepping back into the same dream,  with the same players, over and over again.

Another thing I was disappointed with was that I felt like Terry spent a lot less time developing his characters and story. Now I know that in the past,  he tended to spend an inordinately long time on both, but by the time you finished another Shannara series,  you felt like you had an intimate knowledge of characters like;  Walker Boa, Shea Ohmsford, Grianne Ohmsford, Allanon, Wren Elessedil and more.  Just as J. R. R. Tolkien pioneered Middle Earth, I always felt like Terry Brooks pioneered the Four Lands.

But in this newest Shannara series,  “The Dark Legacy of Shannara”  I felt as though Brooks was in a rush to get somewhere, and I had to spend 366 pages with strangers.

Almost like speed dating; five minutes with strangers, expecting to find the love of your life; great expectations, without any of the calories.

Yet for all that, I still love Brooks and will continue to aspire to model my own writing after his. Few authors today are able,  or willing,  to tell a story without embellishing it with profanity, depravity, or pornographic sex.

In every book he’s written,  the author demonstrates  moral integrity,  while till delivering excitement, fantasy, and adventure.  Like his predecessor Tolkien, Brooks provides content that is ageless,  classic,  and which any parent, at any time, will never have to worry about the wisdom of letting children under the age of ten read.

So even though I was disappointed by the journey of yet another Elessedil, Leah, and Ohmsford looking for lost Elfstones, I am not disappointed in the author’s commitment to leaving us a legacy of quality writing that I have every intention of passing on to other generations of dreamers, and alien life forms.

From the laptop of an uncensored dreamer,

SSpjut

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The Heretic’s Wife


 Brenda Rickman Vantrease, ST. Martin’s Press, New York, 2012

Among the natural rights of the colonists are these: First a right to life, secondly to liberty, and thirdly to property; together with the right to defend them in the best manner they can.”  Samuel Adams

Several years ago I purchased Ms. Vantrease’s book, “The Mercy Seller” but just couldn’t get into the story line. Not that there was anything wrong with the storyline, but during that period of my life,  I wasn’t reading a lot of fictional books, so trying to make myself read this one wasn’t working.

But then a couple of weeks ago I came across the “The Heretic’s Wife” and thought, “What the heck. The worst thing that can happen is that it’ll end up on the slowly growing pile of books I can’t even pay myself to read, let alone waste the time to comment on.”

Let me start off by assuring both the reader, as well as the author, that this book was worth not only the time it took for me  to read it, but the time it took to  comment as well.

I’d also like to add, that I have placed  it on a shelf as far from the garbage heap of  the unread and discarded,  as possible.

It was truly one of my favorite history reads to-date (It doesn’t’ hurt that I am a huge fan of that particular era of history (1500-1600 AD), or that as a Christian,  I am always fascinated by people who have lived a life of conviction, no matter the cost).

Brenda Rickman Vantrease

Bookpod: Brenda Rickman Vantrease: freedom-of-speech-in-tudor-england

Set in the early 1500’s during the reign of King Henry the VIII, the author  does a brilliant job of drawing out of history annuals the players and events surrounding the persecution of people like William Tyndale, John Firth and hundreds of others involved with interpreting and publishing the Holy Scriptures from Latin into other languages. People persecuted and burned at the stake  by  individuals such  as Sir Thomas More, Thomas Cromwell , John Fisher and Mary Queen of Scots (to name only a few); who believed themselves to be the ambassadors of God, the Holy Roman Papacy, and  King;  men and women convinced that it was their responsibility to eradicate, at all costs, any and all who would try and  advocate for religious, government, or social reform.

The main character of this story  is Kate Gough-Firth;  sister to John Gough (an historically known English Bookseller and smuggler of Luther and Tyndale’s printed scriptures); fictional wife to John Firth (historical translator of scriptures from Latin to English) and instigator of Finnish woman of faith (woman later arrested and burned as seditionist’s  and witches).

Through no intentional plan on her part, Kate finds herself;  harboring  the much sought for Oxford – student -turned – heretic John Firth; smuggling New Testament Bibles across England’s borders,  and leading others in the pursuit of religious freedom. It’s a story told through the eyes and heart of a woman caught up and  tossed through history  by the passion and convictions of those she loves.

“I come hither, good people, accused and condemned for an heretic, Sir Thomas More being my accuser and my judge. And these be the articles that I die for. First, I say it is lawful for every man and woman to have God’s book in their mother tongue. Second, that the Bishop of Rome is Antichirst…The Lord forgive Sir Thomas More”. Statement Made By James Bainham Upon His Burning, April 1532

“The Heretic’s Wife” has all the rich ingredients of  history, conviction, injustice, and romance that make for a good read.  But even more than that, it is a reminder that we in America (and other democratic countries), live  off the freedoms that our ancestors paid dearly for. And whether you’re a Christian, Muslim, Atheist, Agnostic,  or Buddhist,  the fact that we have the liberty to read, speak, and protest without threat to life, family, or goods, is something we should always be grateful for,  and  never take lightly.

When I see Americans and people from other nations or  cultures  protesting in front of our government buildings, businesses,  and schools,  condemning whatever political – special interest group that is currently pissing  them off,  I breath a prayer of thanksgiving that we are still able to do that;  because somebody else had the courage to stand up to the Nero’s, Pope Peter’s, Sir Thomas More’s, slave trader-owners, or denier of human rights,  and demand  all human beings have the right to pursue conviction of faith and political belief (more often than not, at the cost to their own lives).

“Let it not make thee despair, neither yet discourage thee, O reader, that it is forbidden thee in pain of life and goods … to read the Word of thy soul’s health; …for if God be on our side, what matter maketh it who be against us, be they bishops, cardinals, popes…” From William Tyndale’s The Obedience of a Christian Man, 1528

So whatever your religious preference (or not), literary interest, political persuasion, or internal moral compass, the right to breathe and enjoy the freedoms you do have, should awaken in you a sense of gratitude and awe. You may not like our current political leaders or social reformers, but as long as they are protecting the rights our forefathers (and  military personnel), who have or are currently shedding their own blood and fortune for us,  then at least have the decency to honor their measure of bravery as well.

I have to rate “The Heretic’s Wife” at four stars for overall plot and story, and four and a five for its ability to weave history with conviction of faith. Excellent!

From the laptop of an uncensored dreamer,

SSpjut

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Spammers | Chipped Beef


And Other Assorted Unwanted Garbage

Garnering advise from other successful bloggers, authors, and who-whats, I try to be diligent about keeping up will the comment department of both my blog, and the ones I  am a ghostwriter for. And as you’ve probably already guessed, it didn’t take me long to discover that not all spammer’s get spammed. Oh the really nasty – this is worse than porn – your mother should wash your mouth|mind out with soap – spam does. I guess those aren’t difficult for Spam Blockers to pick up (but occasionally even one or two of those manage to get through). But after awhile, I start feeling like I’ve just waded into a chat room whose occupants are more like pubescent teenagers than adults.

Yet when I started to investigate how to block this kind of garbage from clogging up the comment stream, I discovered that often its the very spammers I’m trying to get rid of, that are the ones trying sell me the software to keep them out. Much like the notorious Kim Dotcom, it seems many of these dubious internet leeches get off on creating havoc and then selling its remedy.

Urban Dictionary: spammer; A clever, diabolical person who gets free non-stop advertisement across the globe in millions of people’s electronic mail boxes.

What is it about liberty and the right to be a jerk that fuels that kind of thinking? In a country where we haven’t yet taken up throwing our  dissidents into prison for being smarter than the average bear, it seems to me that abusing that freedom will eventually lead to self-destruction, ie; creating more and more laws to stop online mayhem,  which will ultimately leads to censorship, and big brother getting even bigger.

And it’s not just the twenty minutes I have to waste going through this stuff; it’s the whole, “What makes you think I would have anything to do with you now?” that makes me growl, and say very un-lady like things. Do they honestly think that spamming my blog site will generate some dormant need to buy whatever it is their trying to sell, or waste anther twenty minutes looking at theirs? Why would anyone in their right mind want to create links or association with individuals who only want to spam you? It’s like going on a blind date and discovering that the other party has no interest in anything that’s going to take longer than ten or fifteen minutes of their time.

Not only are they irritating, but a lot of them use our URL’s, Podcasts etc. to monetize their own sites, or generate more mischief on yours(should you make the mistake of clicking on whatever it is their trying to sell).

In my not so humble opinon, spammers are individuals who are either too lazy to invest in themselves and the community they’re so desperately trying to be a part of, or their demented twits who need to get another life. In either case, they’re intrusion into my email or  the comment stream of blog sites,  makes it harder for those who are legitimately trying to engage in the community to even get their comments read.

I’m not personally fond of censorship (I like my freedom of speech, the right to bear arms, and the ability to make my own choice to just say no), but after spending the better part of my morning wading through this kind of stuff, I’d almost reconsider…almost. But since I refuse to forfeit my freedom over their lack of integrity, I’ll just have to keep doing to them what I’ve done with anyone who tries to feed me congealed meat in a can…politely say “No thank you”, and scrape it in the garbage.

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